"You were a million years of work,"
Said God and His angels, with needle and thread.
They kissed your head and said,
"You're a good kid and you make us proud.
So just give your best and the rest will come,
And we'll see you soon."
I think that this is the most beautiful way of seeing ourselves.
I have been too of-this-world for the past year- refusing to believe in anything bigger, refusing to engage spiritually in anything.
I caught myself telling friends today my job seems hopeless. I told them that the cycle of poverty only perpetuates itself and these high schoolers that I spend everyday aren't going to make it.
Then, I put my headphones in and started walking to the bus stop. When I walk down the street listening to music, I am literally the happiest person on the planet. I caught myself thinking, I am living heaven on earth! I thought about all the people I love and just. felt. happy.
And then I felt really bad for what I had said about the kids I was on my way to be with. If I am being honest with myself, it really does seem hopeless. There is a handful of 14+ year olds that can barely read or write and instead of investing or being afraid for their futures, I have chosen to numb myself to their lives. Because they seem too hard, too devastating, too full of disappointment. It is easier for me just to not engage, because at every turn, there is a closed door, a dead sibling, a father in prison.
I am committing, right now to be hopeful for them. I am committing to engage with the spiritual side of me that allows me to believe in what I cannot see. Because each one of them was a million years of work, and we can't just go wasting that. It is difficult to work with poor kids but it is impossible if we don't believe in them. Too many people have written them off, and with all that's in me, I refuse to do that any more. It will be harder and sadder for sure, but it will be more real and I think, more beautiful.
Said God and His angels, with needle and thread.
They kissed your head and said,
"You're a good kid and you make us proud.
So just give your best and the rest will come,
And we'll see you soon."
I think that this is the most beautiful way of seeing ourselves.
I have been too of-this-world for the past year- refusing to believe in anything bigger, refusing to engage spiritually in anything.
I caught myself telling friends today my job seems hopeless. I told them that the cycle of poverty only perpetuates itself and these high schoolers that I spend everyday aren't going to make it.
Then, I put my headphones in and started walking to the bus stop. When I walk down the street listening to music, I am literally the happiest person on the planet. I caught myself thinking, I am living heaven on earth! I thought about all the people I love and just. felt. happy.
And then I felt really bad for what I had said about the kids I was on my way to be with. If I am being honest with myself, it really does seem hopeless. There is a handful of 14+ year olds that can barely read or write and instead of investing or being afraid for their futures, I have chosen to numb myself to their lives. Because they seem too hard, too devastating, too full of disappointment. It is easier for me just to not engage, because at every turn, there is a closed door, a dead sibling, a father in prison.
I am committing, right now to be hopeful for them. I am committing to engage with the spiritual side of me that allows me to believe in what I cannot see. Because each one of them was a million years of work, and we can't just go wasting that. It is difficult to work with poor kids but it is impossible if we don't believe in them. Too many people have written them off, and with all that's in me, I refuse to do that any more. It will be harder and sadder for sure, but it will be more real and I think, more beautiful.
1 comment:
...real life... kind of messy.
(Better when surrounded by the God of Hope.)
At our church, the pastors have a habit of telling babies that have just been dedicated "Believe in Jesus, He is your only Hope." It's good that they don't understand it yet...
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